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Randy Cunningham/Quotes
Last Stall on the Left *(He finds out he's the new Ninja) Oh, my... SWEE-EE-T! *"Believe in the weapon that is in the suit."? Okay, what's in the suit? I'm... in the suit. I'm the weapon! I just have to believe in me! *Hello, students! T'is I, THE NINJA! *Remember to tip those lunch ladies! *Come on, baby, drop some secret ninja knowledge on me. *I believe in me; I believe in me; I believe in me kicking your butt! *I wouldn't say I'm getting pwned... *Aw man, I am getting pwned! *Who's gettin' pwned now?! *I don't know how it works, but the ninja suit is the straight-up cheese. *Now as the Ninja I must be prepared at any time to do this (punches air), and this (kicks air), and how could I forget this? (kicks air) *Ninja block, ninja block, ninja block, ninja block, aaannnd ninja block! *No, Howard, this stinks. Smoke bomb! (throws down smoke bomb) *I think he has to wait for like a monster or robot to attack... *I mean, it's not like he can just smokebomb on by for a meet and greet. Or... can he? *I NEED! TO USE! THE BATHROOM! * I have to tell Howard ! * looks back at the box * " You Can't Tell Anyone " Ohhhh that's ramp Got Stank *(To Howard) Hey, why don't you come up with the plan for once? (laughs) *Yeah, now we're just two freshmen kickin' it in speedos. Nothin' embarrassing about that. *I HAVE TO DE-STANK 'EM, BRO! *Gotta de-stank this geek! *So here's a question Bucky. What's going on here... L-like in this area..? *I do not feel right about beating up a band geek! So U Think U Can Stank *(To Heidi, who called him Andy) Randy, name's Randy. Known you my whole life. *Schweet! They know both our names! Plan worked! Ten out of ten! McFists of Fury *McFist is so Bruce! He's the cheese! His name should be Bruce McCheese! He is my hero! *Monica was hot, but that's ridiculous. punches him Aw, come on! That was a great line! *But you can't be the bad guy! You're Hannibal McFist! You manufacture awesome! *What better mask for a villain... than the most beloved man in town! *(to Howard about history) Then why am I getting a D in it? *''into a building'' Building! That's a building! *Ninja Nomicon! I'll be behind that tree. *"Beware the enemy who wears a hero's mask." That Robo-Ninja is no hero! Don't worry! I'm on it! Gossip Boy *Every once in a while my ninja-ing takes me to a wicked gross place I call the "Shnasty Zone". *Ninja sprint! *Ninja stop, ninja stop, ninja stop.....! *Aw, shnasty! The Tale of the Golden Doctor's Note *Awesome! At! Riddles! Me! *Aw, we've just been Greened! *The Nomicon! (Howard: That's your mathbook.) I meant the Nomicon! (whips out the Nomicon) *Probably shouldn't have left Julian behind. *Sweet ninja, that hurt! House of 1,000 Boogers *McSquiddles! LICK THE LIGHTING! *I'll be in the Nomicon! *Ninja surf! *He only ate a booger, there's no way that can come back to haunt me! *The greatest party in the history in high school and we're not invited. This burns man, this burns deep. *Howard, I can't just Ninja out because we wanna go to Bash's party. Now if Bash's stepdad was my arch nemesis or- Oh, my Ninja! *"A ninja must master the art of stealth." Yes, okay, yes! Reveal, conceal. Conceal, reveal. Camouflage? Oh, that is so BRUCE! Attack of the Killer Potatoes *Potato coming to life, not a big deal... *Okay, now that's a big deal! *BOOM, gravity! SCIENCE! Or is it a law? *You know, Howard, we've learned a valuable lesson from this... (laughs) *Brown Noser! (referring to Bucky) Dawn of the Driscoll *Ninja bone dodge! *Ninja rotating table kick! *Where did your husband take -(pause)- that boy whose name I do not know. *Ninja lead! *Viceroy, just need to talk... *Jerry! Driscoll! Is! ALIVE! *And you married that wacko? *Not if I have anything to say about it- h'oh boy. Not if Viceroy has anything to say about it. A lot of science in here... *How do you like me now, homie? *Ugh, heads UP! *How does the bowtie stay on? That makes no sense! *So Booce! Did you get it? Booce. *My hands! I can't control them! Nothing is safe! Nothing is safe! Night of the Living McFizzles *Theresa, you scared the juice out of- Howard, just Howard and I'm very brave. *You're holding my hand. I mean, yo that's cool baby. Howard, you want to get in on this? *Go for it some of us are scaredy babies and some of us are me. *''Mind?'' By all means. *I'm not scared! *G-G-Ghost! That's a honkin' ghost! *You guys get out of here. *Okay, I can handle this. Or should I say the Ninja... Mask is with Howard! *Really? We're still doing that? Just give me the mask. *Please, Debbie Kang, we're guys. Guys don't get scared. *I would be delighted. They don't call me Hardcore Cunningham for nothing. *I'm not a scaredy baby! If anyone's a scaredy baby, it's gotta be you! Monster Dump *Aw, that means so much to - that boy I never heard of. *You're all kinds of schnasty! (holding Nicholas) *Um, you could take a vacation from helping my archenemy try to kill me! *If it was easy it wouldn't be awesome! We just have to find a way to get up there. *Hey, where are the victory nachos? *Those 'chos were for both of us! Viva El Nomicon *Ninja flash back! *Ninja time chop! *You're giving us an F?! *An F?! *Hey, look! It's that guy! *Mexican Death Bear?! *It's too fast, it's too strong... *Hork up the band geek! *I am in the ZONE. *(The Nomicon falls on his head) GAH! (falls in pain) NOMICON! THAT'S A NOMICON! 30 Seconds to Math *''the crowd'' I'm the Ninja! ...Why did I say that? *What has 5 nipples and is going to win the Battle of the Bands? These guys! * ( to Howard ) Howard !? What are u putting cupcakes in your EAR !? Monster Drill *''Laughing'' Free the chicken? What am I supposed to do with that? *Clouds, wind, chicken! Chicken! *(Howard insults his Ninja scarf) Hey! The scarf is a serious Ninja tool! Plus, it's cool! IT'S COOL! Silent Punch, Deadly Punch *WINTER BREAK! Stank'd to the Future *Let's skip the "roar play" and get right to the fun stuff! *NO! That is all kinds of gross! Smokebomb! *BOOM! Knot not tied, tied. Wave Slayers *Howard, sometimes you have to say what the juice... WHAT THE JUICE?! *Ah...Oh...Oh...What? Ah no. That's enough for today. Frantic Howard, wait up! Everything is fine here! Nothing is broken! Sword Quest *Howard, I'm NOT gonna fight with a balloon. *I get what you were saying all this time! THIS balloon is my sword! And I'M GONNA NINJA WITH IT! *(Inside a cactus field) This isn't that bad... I was WRONG! There are so many! So many pointy things! All of them hurt all over my body! Gah, my balloon! My ballon is all I care about! Howard, do NOT push me! Howard! Oh, now I'm gonna push you-- I missed, I missed and my face is touching it! * New new rule, I'm not letting go this ballon. No matter what. Nukid on the Block *Say hello to my Ninja eye-poke! *Those are ridiculous... ly awesome! *The Class-Fecta isn't a real thing. *''Howard'' I am the Ninja, I like being the Ninja, it's my duty. But I wouldn't expect you to understand what it means to have a duty. *''Franz'' "The most dangerous enemy often wears the mask of an ally." Ugh, you're the enemy the Nomicon was warning me about! *Well, I guess you have to know the difference between your Franz and your enemies. *Howard, I acted like a total shoob. I thought my only duty was being the Ninja but I was wrong. I have two duties, a ninja duty, and a best friend duty.....No you can laugh, I said duty a lot of times. Weinerman Up *Howard, bad sportsmanship does not look good on you. *That was so bruce! I give myself 1,000 Ninja points! *"A Ninja must know when winning is losing and losing is winning." If I want the robot to lose, I have to let Howard win! Alright Howard, you want the high score, come and get it. Evil Spirit Week *Photo! Bomb! Us! Now! *I might have accidentally released an ancient bird thing which possessed you. *This is the Bruce-est thing in the history of BRUCE! Der Monster Klub *Eh... It-it's just a game, right? Grave Puncher: The Movie! *(in high-pitched voice) Over there! Look! Over! There! *Clouds, wind, chicken, NINJA AIR FIST!.....Okay, that air fist should've worked. *Deceit often comes at a price. We caused the mess, we gotta pay the price. I have to destroy the projector! Escape from Detention Island *You've done epic damage here. Like more than usual. I think it's safer if I took this one. *Howard doesn't mean that. I mean he's saying it but he doesn't mean it. *Oh it's a dragon! *The three main rocks on this island are NINJA RING! NINJA RING! AND NINJA RING! *Something bad is about to happen. *Everyone! Escape thorough my crack! *Relax, he's only a hologram. *No, no he's a robot. He is all robot. *Eat lava! *Why don't you take this one, Big H? *See yea in detention. Bash Johnson: 11th Grade Ninja *Gravy fries, prepare to be in my mouth! *gasp* Who?! What?! When?! Where?! Why?! HOWWWWWWW?! *''just ate Randy's gravy fries.'' (Howard: In my defense, gravy fires.) And I counter with... HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO YOUR BEST FRIEND?! *Wait, you guys actually believe that Bash is the Ninja? Baaasssh? Bash! *I knew it! Revealing your identity is dangerous! That's exactly why I didn't do it! -(pause)- Okay, okay, I was gonna do it, but I didn't, so let's move on. Ninja Camp *Mac Antfee, prepare to get your butt whooped by a nicewad. *What am I suppose to learn from that PSYCHO?! If that's the kind of ninja I'm suppose to be, then you got the wrong freshman! *I'm not the wrong guy to be the ninja, right? *Really, Nomicon, this is the past ninja you wanted me to learn from? *It's the Pagoda of Knowledge, and it's stupid, this whole place is stupid! How could you make the squad and I didn't? I'm the NINJA! *Oh, hey, Mac, thought I'd stop by. See how the whole "splosions" goin'. *''No, Honkin, Way!'' *Fine, just one thing, SMOKEBOMB! *Ugh, Ninja Camp. sarcastic Great idea Howard, you know we should go again next year. Enter the Nomicon *Ain't no shame losing to the class of IN YOUR FACE! *I'm gonna wipe his butt- MINDwipe his butt is what I meant! *In the Nomicon, anything is possible... *''Howard, about Mac Antfee'' HE THREW YOU OUT OF A PAGODA! *(to Howard) You took that from my wallet while I was shloomped down, didn't you? *I am mad.(Howard talks) You ate my lunch!!!(Howard talks) What's on the side of your mouth?(Howard: Nothing.) *gasps* This is not over. Sorcerer in Love *Howard. We have to get dates! (short pause) (Randy and Howard laugh) *That's exactly the kind of cheesy line you'll never hear if you go out with me! *Someone's gonna find the most beautiful thing in school. It's only a matter of time! *Cute, NinjaNomicon. I mean, not helpful, but cute. *The Carp's Eye! Above its nose and no ears! It's the most beautiful thing in school! *We found it, Howard! *It's so not repulsive. *Ninja Duck, Ninja Flip! NInja Slide, Ninja Slide! Yeah, baby! (debris falls on his head) Ah, come on! *Okay, guys, I know Amanda's hot. Super hot, but she's not... (gets blasted by the Sorceress) *Trust me, I don't want her. *The nose did not need to know that. *Wanna go to my house and get our Grave Punch on? *(After Theresa asks Randy if he wants to dance with her) Sure do! Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge *Just one thing: you're not a hero. *Because you jump in the last second and yanked your Biffer's cheese, Howard-style *You didn't save the day, you saved the second. That medal should say: "Randy does all the work, while Howard jumps in at the last second and yanks his cheese!" *Hey, what's this, some kind of line? *(to Theresa) Not a hero. *This calls for a hero. **Howard: I'm on it! **Randy: I mean the Ninja, not you, Baby Buckaroo! *It's Ninja Ti... grabs his hand THERESA!...You're holding my hand! That's quite a grip you got there. *Theresa, I don't suppose you have your twirling sticks on you? **Theresa: Am I gonna get this back? **Randy: No. *Hey, demon dogs! (throws Theresa's twirling stick) Fetch! *Yes, yes! Now, quick everyone to the bathroom! *He's yanking my cheese again! *Stop yanking my cheese! *Theresa: (scared) What do we do now? **Randy: (to Howard) Yeah, hero, what do we do now? *I have no faith in you. *Theresa, I think you'd be safer with Howard. He's the (facepalms) real hero. **Theresa: (sadly) Really? **Randy: I'm afraid so, but, I'll be right behind you. *''the portal to the Land of Shadows'' Hachi-Machi! What the juice is that?! *(to the Sorceress) Not gonna happen, they're long gone by now. *(to Howard) You saved me. *(to Howard) (laughs) Trust me, I wasn't that into it either. *(to Howard) I was wrong. You're a total hero, *(to Howard) Of course I'm a hero too, I mean I did banish the Sorceress back to the Land of Shadows. *(to Bash) No Bash, (raises Howard's hand) this hero will show you the way. Shloomp! There It Is! *Pretty bad but, it's worth it. If it makes me a better Ninja. *When? Name one time. *Better shloomp on it. *Besides when you go full-Nomicon, you go full-Nomicon, that's why it's called full-Nomicon. *(to Nomicon) Oh, I ask myself, gotcha. (to NomiRandy) Okay me, I'm leaving Rechunkulous but honestly-- (gets slapped by NomiRandy) *Pardon me, me, but, what the juice?! *What am I doing to me?! *Yo, who cares what the book says? *I'm goin' Barely-Chunk (NomiRandy starts eating Barely-Chunk straight from the machine) *Hey, looking good girl, what's up P Slimz (opens his locker, looks at his reflection and winks) How you doin'? *Uh-oh this is gonna hurt. *Yeah you sure about that (kicks the boombox, starts dancing, starting with a spin and points at Bash after the wave) *Yo sup Weiner-Babe, girl how 'bout you and I get together and turn (points Heidi's nose) your me-cast into a we-cast uh-huh? *Why aren't I stopping her, oh, right that's not me, I'm me and I'm tied to a chair *I don't get it, I went full-Nomicon, why aren't you telling me what to do, JUST TELL ME WHAT TO DO! *Howard you freed me, what are you doing in the Nomicon? *I call him NomiRandy and he's bad news! *I don't know. Nomicon won't tell me what to do. It just keeps saying that. Howard the Nomicon's lesson: A Ninja without balance will fall." *I need to go half-Nomicon! Boom-bam-boom! Balance! *No honkin' way, I like it here. *(Mocking) I'm Randy Cunningham, I never give up. *And I will, with my ninja bouquet. Theresa, these are, umm... so there's this guy, Randy Cunningham, I think that's his name, and he, and there, there was, umm... and he's sorry. Here. [puts bouquet on the ground] *It's Randy, Randy! I just met the guy, I know it's Randy. (asks Jed and Scott) Am I wrong about this? (Jed and Scott shrug their shoulders) sheesh, smokebomb! *Let's just call it a swirl. Randy Cunningham: 13th Century Ninja *We went back in time! *Okay, I admit, this looks bad, but we can't give up! *C'mon, you stopped this guy once! *From where I came from, you did! *We're Ninjas, we never quit! I can't believe he just quit! He's the First Ninja, he's a legend! sighs Fine! If you won't help then-- interrupted by Howard *I'm not gonna say that! *No, 'cause you just did! *Yoohoo, Mr. Sorcerer! *I was not ready! Ninja Rage NOW I'm ready! *Ow, my guts! He hit me in my guts! *Hey, First Ninja! You're back! NINJAS NEVER SAY QUIT! Other Quotes *What the juice?! *So honkin' cool! *So bruce! *Smokebomb! *Oh, my Ninja! *Let's do this! *Ah, that's wonk! *Ninja flip! *NINJA RINGS! *NINJA AIR FIST ! Category:Character Quotes Category:Randy Cunningham Information Category:Main Characters